Let the madness begin...


SONG OF THE UPDATE:

"IF WE ALL FUC" by THA DOGG POUND (FEATURING SNOOP DOGG)

"I seen this ho, yeah what's up bitch..."

That opening bar from Kurupt may be the greatest start to a song in the last 15 years. After that it's on cruise control as Kurupt, Daz and Snoop pimp stroll, ho wreck and chin check all over that amazing Daz beat. I actually heard a DJ spin this at a party once and I rushed the dancefloor...sober! Something this too cool wallflower never does. Anybody who hasn't heard this song is not living life to the fullest. I spoke with Majik Most about re-doing this over the same beat and switchin up the words a little, but it's a risk to touch a classic. Being a native New Yorker, a lotta dudes out here weren't exactly feelin Dogg Pound after they did a video and stomped all over Manhattan. But I'm a Queens resident, so I could care less. Death Row in 1995 was the shit. Hell, they made a muthafuckin Christmas album! So buy that Dogg Food album and play this loud in a residential area!


OLD SCHOOL CHICK OF THE UPDATE:

LISA BONET

OK, I know after she got with Lenny K. she went all Woodstock Flower Pot on us. But Lisa in the mid-80's was SMOKIN! Right when she was still normal, but past that innocent teen phase of the Cosby Show first season. She could get it all day long. Not only the finest Huxtable, but fine in general. Then she became a hippie, but shit, she could still get it. But times have changed. Anybody seen little Rudy Huxtable, aka Keisha Knight, lately? I saw her recently in Ebony mag and the joke is on all them other Cosby girls (Raven Simone included). Lil Rudy is BADDDD!!!! Lisa? Keisha? Shit, even Sandra, the older one. Get at the Captain!


NBA WRAP UP

OK, I put my blurb about my new found sportswriter career on the New Ish page, so we'll get to the wonderful world of pro sports...


MIAMI=NBA CHAMPS 2006

How the fuck did they do it? All they had to give up was Eddie Jones, Keyon Dooling and some loose ends to get Antoine "Disco" Walker? It's showtime! People can hate on 'Toine all they want, but he's a true entertainer and his "shimmy" is the best dance since the Running Man. He'll shoot 2 for 48 from 3 point range in one game and make it look good! And Jason "Mo Frills" Williams at the point? Whew! And Posey on defense! No need to even mention the best player in the NBA and Shaq (who took a paycut to stay 'cause he knows what's up!) If they wind up pullin Mike Finley, it's completely a wrap for the other 29 teams in the NBA. I'm glad my pops lives near Miami cause season tickets and one month vacations during the playoffs are a must. Don't even think about finding me in May.

NY PRICKS

Is Larry Brown the best coach in the game? Yes. Do the Knicks have talent on paper? Yes. Will they win? Emphatically no. I'd be surprised if they made the playoffs. Larry Brown will be trying to win a championship around Malik Rose and Q Rich, Crawford and Marbury will alternate taking 50 shots a game and drive him crazy. I just can't wait for all the drama, I could care less about the basketball. I've lost hope for NY. And don't think because the Atlantic is weak that NY will slide in. NJ is lookin beast-like, Boston is solid and gutter as hell and Philly has less talent, but better chemistry than NY. I can almost guarantee NY will fight with Toronto for the basement slot in the Atlantic. Yo NY, prove me wrong, for once!!!!

Other teams that look good as of now:

CLEVELAND: Gettin Larry Hughes was big, but cuttin Tractor Traylor was wrong.
PHOENIX: They lost Q, but Kurt Thomas will give em some much needed help down low for Amare.
SEATTLE: They re-sign Ray, erythang is OK.

Ya strugglin!:

LA LAKERS: Phil Jackson or not, they look shitty. Kwame Brown and Kobe? WTF!?!
MINNESOTA: Kevin is gettin older and needs help...badly.
WASHINGTON: Arenas is still the man, but losing Hughes and Juan Dixon hurt them.

That's it for now. Feel free to hate, but you know I'm right!

Later,
Backslap